Sunday, March 6, 2011

Man Made the Money...Money Never Made the Man

I sit back and contemplate how selfish the entire human race can be at times....myself included, and I wonder what it is that makes some of us so self-centered, "stingy" and subsequently, even envious at times.  Is it because times are hard and we don't know where our next meal is coming from? Okay, I can buy that for some people, but for most, it's probably not the case. You "have," but for some odd reason, just don't feel you have enough. Is it because we think that by giving, somehow the other person will be "one up" on us.....meaning, if I give you XXX (fill in the blank) you will somehow be better off than me, and that's something you just can't stomach? Hmmm.....unfortunately I sometimes feel that this may be the case. After all, we know for lots of people, they just can't stand the fact that again, someone is better off than they are, and that transcends to many facets of life, not just the financial ones. Substantiating this, I have had relatives~ yes relatives, and you know who you are, look at me up and down and sideways, talking behind my back, all because of some "fantasy life" you've conjured me up as having. I say fantasy because you fail to see and probably don't care to see the full picture. You see me laughing, dining, sharing my life with my friends...living my days to the fullest, like the money never ends or as one of my good friends called it "The Oprah Syndrome". What you don't get is the notion that "I made the money and pray to never let it make me." For over 10 years, I too was just another girl on the IRT. Known in NYC as the Interborough Rapid Transit System, weaving in and out of the triborough area faster than my dreams could ever materialize. Not a trust fund baby or born with a "silver spoon" although Ricky Shroeder did play a fulfilling role in my pre-pubescent life. Hustle and flowing like the "next one," hoping this ride would bring me back the money please. Gotta love Jay Z! And all of this to see my way out and forge a better life for those that come after, my girls included-well, the ones who really got my back. And "everybody knows", I usually don't think twice about sharing my blessings, but if you have to think twice, you probably shouldn't think once.

As Maxwell sang in his velvety voice, I want to encourage my girls that care enough to grow, to "open your eyes and see what's in front of your face." Enjoy the fruits of your labor down to the pits and the seeds and be willing to share your fruit with others. Looking at one another sideways will never enable you to see the blessings coming head-on in your direction. And last but not least, like the MAC that you wear, know that money will never make you who you are, it will only enhance what is already there.

Friday, January 7, 2011

You're Fancy Huh?

Okay ladies....now you know I love you all to death, but would really like to start an open and perhaps even heated conversation on our proirities, and I say "our" because I have definitely been victim to not having my priorities in order. Spending my last dollar on fashion when I knew I had bills to pay. Eating half a dozen donuts-yes, I did say half of a dozen, when I knew my behind could barely fit into the brand new jeans that had been hanging in my closet complete with tags for the last ummm (clearing my throat) 3 years. Can you even wear high-waist jeans anymore?

Just as the title of this entry and the popular song suggests "nails done, hair done, everything did," collectively, we tend to take care of all of our superficial whims and think nothing about taking care of the more essential items in life. Essential being-life insurance, health, college funds for our children, owning a home, vacationing (and yes-that is essential).

I have had girlfriends actually say "I am not saving for so and so's college education....they can take a loan the same way I did." Huh? Is this the best you have to offer your child, while blowing $500 buying the best Malaysian hair your stylist can weave. I've had associates (I would not use the term girlfriend here) go out to the club on the 1st when they knew rent was due on the 5th ....oh I know this all too well, as we have evicted some of the best looking tenants the city of Hot-lanta has to offer. No shame in their game as we were putting their belongings out on the sidewalk.

Please don't get upset after you read this, but instead, view it as motivation to do your best. We need to make a concerted effort to break the cycle of our kids struggling because we have not prepared for them. We need to make the effort to provide a better life for ourselves and our offspring than what our parents could provide for us. The things we were dying from years ago, shouldn't be the same things that plague us today ....HIV, diabetes, lung cancer, obesity. We are abundant in resources, including education, but the last thing we do is take care of ourselves as we know we should. Live life to the fullest and be prideful, appreciating the fact that we have the ability to achieve what our parents may have only dreamed of. We can live healthier, fulfilling and truly fancy lives if we channel our energy in the right place. You know you had to hear it from someone. Just be glad it's someone who truly cares for you!

http://www.provenhealthadvantage.com/

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Topgrading and "F***ing up."

Now you know I won't use profanity here cause like the female comedian Adele Givens, "I'm a lady!" So let me tell you from the start where I'm going with this.

In my not so distant past, I recall being a part of a company that subscribed to utilizing what's called a "topgrading" process. This is a process by which some organizations "weed out"  the dead weight aka non-producing employees and aim to hire, coach & maintain their best talent aka "A" players.  I thought about this concept as I contemplated 2011 and all that it holds in store. I thought about what it's going to take to get ahead, how to achieve and surpass my goals and ultimately, how to create a fulfilling life for my family. Am I holding on to "dead weight?" Am I surrounding myself with people who are uplifting and people who I aspire to be similar to in some respect? Am I stimulated, intrigued and challenged? I can surely answer these questions with a resounding "Yes."

Benchmarks have been set and performance will be consistently measured. I am confident in my team, their abilities and value. After all, I only want the best of the best. Like my hubby used to joking say "I don't 'F-down.' I F-up." A double entendre to say the least, but simply meaning "looking up, be-friending up, dressing-up, aspiring-up." Get it? Got it? Good ! (Smile)

I want the best clothes, the best shoes (Tory's are my staple), the best dentists (cause heaven knows teeth are essential) speaking of which, gotta make this run to the ortho for the 2nd time in my lifetime...so be on the lookout for the new tracks that will grace this face. Only the best will do.

Coming into the new year.....I want you to contemplate the topgrading process. What bad habits are you weeding out? Negative people, destructive thoughts? Do you have the best of the best on your team? Don't surround yourself with people who have the same problems that you have. Now that's topgrading.

Grow as you were intended to. I wish you all a mentally, emotionally and physically healthy 2011!

www.provenhealthadvantage.com